“Happiness is when, what you think, what you say, and what you do, are in harmony”
Happiness is very subjective and its definition varies from one individual to another. Happiness can mean :
Psychology=Positive emotions= feeling good, joy, having pleasure
Philosophy=Living a happy life= having a good job, enjoying family, nice relationships
Hedonism= The pursuit of pleasure for its own sake
Three things will keep you unhappy and unsatisfied in life if you do nothing about them:
1-Not knowing what happiness means to you. It seems obvious but many people cannot describe what makes them truly happy, how they feel exactly when they think about being happy. Thinking that if you get something you don’t have now will make you happy in the future prevents you to live in the present and look at what you already have that makes you happy. So looking for something you don’t know is a sure way to keep you frustrated.
Take some time to reflect on your life and define exactly what makes you truly happy and what you really want in life. Identify and take actions on things you have control on.
2-Pleasing others : If you do things you don’t really like just to keep others happy thinking they will love you more, then you will pay the price: not only others won’t like you more for what you do for them but you can become a victim of abusers who exploit your desperate needs to be loved.
Clean your past and understand you true needs, have them met and make a plan to quit destructive habits or toxic relationships
3-Blaming yourself : negative self-talks like I cannot be happy because I am not lovable, I am useless, I am too old, I am fat, I can’t find a job, I am not a good parent etc.
First allow yourself to feel those negative emotions. It seems a paradox but most people blame themselves for playing the blame game, saying things like: ” I should not feel bad, other people in worse situations don’t complain”. Truly expressing what you feel is a healthy habit and it helps you identify what can be changed and allow you to be extra care for yourself.